Oh my, Lot's of good stuff here.

Unfortunately, there's no solution to existential problems. As such there is always an element of logical inconsistencies no matter the position one takes. The reality everyone struggles with is that women have a uterus and men do not. It matters not how we choose to interpret or create laws around that simple fact. By definition, that one factor creates a very different context for decision making between individuals once a pregnancy occurs.

Assuming two people engaged in sex with the exact same intent. Pleasure not pregnancy. It's understandable that if an unintended pregnancy happens unless both are on the same page conflict will emerge. SImple bromides like "wear a condom" are a logically dismissive proposal given what we know about the complexities of reproduction.

It's like saying "wear a mask!" during a pandemic. Sure, it's probably a great idea but it's no guarantee you won't get sick and die.

Until science finds a way to guarantee sexual equity in reproduction by effectively eliminating the functional difference between men and women, arguing over control and responsibility will continue.

It's a paradox grounded in nature. To resolve it, we will be forced to alter nature itself.

As many science fiction novels have shown, we should be careful what we wish for. Unintended consequences can be a real bummer.